How are you #ILPBBGZ family??!! Its so nice to be here again, I am glad to tell you every #momentwithuncleolu is Memorable and blessed.. Well, on this Episode of #MOMENTWITHUNCLEOLU we Feature an incredibly happy lady who has nothing but love for everyone out there especially her plus size sisters, Join me as she shares her journey with us:
Can you tell us about yourself?
Hi, I’m Shawn Kenya Jefferson and I’ve given this world for 42 years, not all good but I’m still standing. I’m originally from Chicago, Illinois, but currently residing in Atlanta. Growing up in Illinois well wasn’t easy where I’m from. Being ridiculed, talked about and made fun of on top of the pain of verbal abuse was never easy for a child. My size was always troubling to everyone else. It kept me from relationships, from knowing what it was like to feel and be beautiful. Growing up your always hear, “You have such a pretty face for a fast girl.” I loathed those bittersweet words. But inspite of all the negative things people said to me, I learned of my uniqueness, my beauty, my curves, I learned to embrace them and take on a new perspective.
Tell me what do you understand about plus size?
I understand that plus size is just a description of what you look like in another eyes. It’s how they perceive you to be not necessary who you are or how you see yourself.
What do you understand about self-love, self-crush and self-worth/self-acceptance?
Wow! For me understanding what it is to truly look upon your full self and take it all in. Acknowledging that you are different and that is okay. And grasping a hold of your curves because they are some of what defines you to you. I love my uniqueness, my beauty, my curves, and my smooth gorgeous skin. I look in the mirror now and all I see is strength, self-awareness, love, and acceptance of who I am. And I can never be duplicated.
How do you feel about being a plus size??
I am a size 26/28 and I wear a size 26 dress, I feel proud and different. I know I am not like others, but I am happy with who I am. We were never all supposed to be the same anyhow. And if we were the same that would make the world uninteresting. The difference in each of us is what makes the world unique and interesting. We each can have a different perspective.
How did you manage to develop self-love in the mix of all the drama in the society, was it easy for you?
No, not easy at all. I got to a point where I was tired of the labels people were putting on me. I believe the first time I realize my true self was in my early twenties. It was a long, hard, and sometimes painful road to get to that place of knowing who I am and a struggle to obtain love of self. Wow! The thing is I always knew that I was a beautiful woman, but never really grasped how beautiful until I begin to truly look at myself. I decided to redefine myself and think differently, reprogramming myself. I started by getting a full body mirror and undressing/dressing each day and while standing in that mirror talking to myself, encouraging myself, acknowledging my gorgeous rolls. And little by little I started to get to a point where nothing said to me negatively mattered, that only how I perceived myself mattered, in addiction I was teased as a child up until my teenage years. I would climb into myself, thinking it was my fault for being different. It damaged my self-esteem. It made me cry a lot and feel unworthy. And I didn’t handle it until later on in life. I got sick and tired of people defining me by their standards. And I decided to organize my own. I changed my perspective on what being plus size was to me. And that is more love. . It took years to get to a place where I believed I was unique, strong, loving, and most of all beautiful in every way. My curves are a part of who I am. I begin in my transformation to see their beauty for the first time and it was like scales had falling off my eyes. I would look in the mirror and smile and look at my body like I had won a trophy. It became an everyday ritual until it was natural. Now, I have a confidence and a love for myself that can never be substituted.
Take few step back to few years ago and tell us how you feel about yourself now??
Compared to what I thought of myself a few years ago, I’d say getting older being a gorgeous plus size woman only makes me that much more grateful. A bit health conscious though. Well! These questions really dig. Lol! Yes, at one point in my life I despise myself. I was repulsed by how I looked and hated to look in the mirror. And it made me have this love /hate of food. I ended up trying several different ways to self-indulge to try and feed that pain. I was depressed and overeating. I was trying everything I could to try and make me happy. If even for a small moment.
Tell us about your wardrobe:
Well, I shop at Avenue, Ashley Stewarts, Lane Bryants, and Simply 10/Fashions when it was around. I would love to own my own plus size clothing line. I have not worn a swim suit in years. But that is all changing. I have actually been purchasing some nice swim pieces that I plan on wearing to Jamaica next year. My best color is coral or pink and finding the right size jeans use to be a challenge until I found the Avenue. Now, my challenges are petticoats. I can never seem to find one that fits my arms well. But I am still looking. LOL
When someone describe you as “FAT” how do you feel and react?
I use to feel hurt and mad. The fact that because I was different gave people the right to call me such an ugly word. It made me mad and want to curse them out.
When I take a look at your purse what are the three most common things I will find?
Lip gloss, gum, and lotion.
What’s your take on the societal view of the plus Size community?
Well, I believe things are starting to get better. But, prior to it was sad. It hurt for people to take a look at a person negatively because they didn’t wear a size 2. To shun a whole category of people based on their weight, sickened me. And I actually believe that I am changing how some people think of plus size women. By displaying myself on social media and encouraging women to embrace their curves and love who they are no matter how big. Inspiring them to be happy with who they are. And letting them know they are not alone. And forming a united front. I don’t envy slimmer women, I believe we should live our lives as we see fit. No matter our size. Because at the end of the day, we all deserve love. And to each its own.
What part of your body do you admire most? /Being plus size, has it ever affected your relationship??
My butt And no, I have always been loved for being who I am.
How did you find out about ILPBBGZ Blog?
Instagram, So far I think it is a movement of plus size awareness. And that to me is awesome.
Any words for friends and sisters in the plus Size community??
Yes, sisters I know it gets hard sometimes when you have other people’s opinions coming at you, but you got to fight that little voice that may tell you to succumb to their idealistic bullshit. Build you up, don’t wait, start today! Change your way of thinking. Embrace every single part of you and love on it with all that you have. And f**k those who don’t. Ask yourself, what makes them the overseer of your life. You are in control of you. And what critics may say from time to time you can’t allow to make or break you. Know who you are, love who you are no matter the size and be bulletproof. Because in the end it is only you that can walk in your own shoes.
Thank you all for this amazing time you have taken out to read through this piece and please remember to share with friends. Thank you once more and remember I love you all now and always.